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Service!

18 Mar 2022Service!

TL;DR - Pubs should NOT be employing people who aren't interested in the products they are selling. They need to find better staff!

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I dunno. So many people out of work... and yet so many people in work who shouldn't be.

I don't know how to solve this. But let me just vent for a moment...

Customer: "Hello, a pint of X please."

Server: (no expression, pours the drink)... "Four pounds ninety please."

Customer: (looks at the beer she has poured, of which about an inch and a half is full of froth. The customer is being overcharged.) The customer, quite understandably, is not happy.

Customer: "Hi, would it be OK if you filled the glass up to the top?"

Server: (Grudgingly, pours another few milligrams of beer into the glass, and looks at the customer as if he had asked her to do something indecent). "Well, here it is. I can't do any better than that." Or words to that effect.

Oh, Sainsbury's. Oh, Morrisons (et al). Did you plant these people to make us want to drink at home? Or am I being over-sensitive?

___

Mac, a sociable creature

Give us a tune(r)

16 Mar 2022Give us a tune(r)

When I was starting out, playing guest spots at open mic nights, I knew nothing.

There would be a sound guy/girl, who would plug you in and check your levels, get you to say "one two" into the mic, and you were away.

Back in the early days, I tuned my guitar by ear. This was a big mistake.

The thing is, the less experience you have playing guitar, the worse you are at tuning your own guitar. You *think* you can do it... you pluck at fifths and tune up or down until it sounds right, but you are only heading for disaster (or, at least, eternal anonymity).

I saw some people play the other day in a local acoustic open mic, and it would have been so much better if they had all tuned their guitars (the ones who did, stood out like shining stars).

Please, lovely musical creative people out there: kindly buy a guitar tuner if you don't already have one. It will cost you a few pounds of your hard-earned cash, but I guarantee you'll get a more positive response from people who can - literally - tune in to your songs. After all, you took all that time to write your beautiful lyrics and world-busting melodies, so give your audience the best version of you, yes?

Two more tips that I learned late in life: #1 - don't press so hard on those frets, people. You'll wear them out, and your guitar won't be in tune any more. And #2 - always tune UP to a note, never DOWN. It's all about friction and tension... physics and all that...

___

Mac, tuning out...

Digital Progress? No.

10 Mar 2022Digital Progress? No.

OK, I am older than many people who are immersed in today's Digital World. I was brought up in an Analogue World.

So, I want to make a point about Digital. It is not always better than Analogue.

"Digital" is a word that is bandied about these days. Somehow, Digital has become synonymous with quality. And this is a dangerous connection to make.

Just because Product A is Digital does NOT make it better than Product B which is Analogue, or old-school.

Let me explain. I have 2 examples for you.

Example 1 : Home TV. In the Olden Days (pre-2000), when TV was analogue, we had a devil of a time getting a steady picture, a decent colour balance, or a good sound. We were used to poor quality TV experiences, because the TVs weren't great, and neither were the aerial installations. But, if you had a great TV set, and a great aerial, you were in for a treat: the best pictures and sound available at the time. No, I couldn't afford that stuff. But, having seen some amazing TV sets from that era (I worked in the TV industry in the 80s) I can tell you that the TV pictures back then were *much better* than the digital TV pictures we get now, even on top-quality equipment. Imagine that - a big step backwards.

Example 2 : Printing. Recently I've had another disappointing bout of product offerings (and unacceptable replacements) from yet another printing company who claims that their Digital printing systems are the best available. This may be true, but it's also true that I could get better quality printing in the past. I could get finished products - flyers, CD inlays, posters - that were exactly what the graphics designer had designed; no shift, no jitter, just pieces of paper or card that carried the exact design that you had wished for. Fast forward from the 1990s to 2022, and it appears that all digital printing presses in the world (a dubious improvement from the old-fashioned offset presses) cannot reliably print your flyer or poster without skewing it, or mis-aligning it, or incorrectly zooming it. Frankly, I am bamboozled by this. When I was studying hard to be an engineer, I honestly thought that the world was going to be a better place. To Digital Printing and Modern TV Broadcasting Techniques, I say... you've guessed it... "No".

___

Mac, Older and Wiser

Music = Happiness

2 Mar 2022Music = Happiness

We've been here before, but some of you are new... so, here's a recap, in the light of all the sad things that are going on in our world...

1. Music is amazing. It lifts, connects, and resolves.

2. Music was not invented by any demonic web giant. Or tyrant. It's OK to like it in your own mind, without telling anyone. Although, if you want to tell someone about how music makes your life better, that's a beautiful thing. But there is no pressure. Your relationship with music is yours to treasure, behold, and enjoy.

3. Lemonrock was created for people who love music, and live music in particular. It was an idea born out of frustration (about poor or absent information) and love (of music, people, and being sociable).

So here's to all of us innocent, music-loving, peaceful people. You guys rock.

___

Mac, peaceful harmoniser of people and music

Picture: Birdy

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